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The
Thirteen Attributes of Mercy
By
Harav Yehuda Amital
zt”l
Translated
by Simon M Jackson
“And
God passed before him and proclaimed...” Rabbi Yochanan said: Were it not written in the text, it
would be impossible for us to say such a thing; this verse teaches us that God
enwrapped Himself like the sheliach tzibbur (prayer leader) of a
congregation and showed Moshe the order of prayer. He said to him: Whenever Israel sin, let them carry out
this service before Me, and I will forgive them. (Rosh Hashana
17b)
The Torah writes “And He passed over” (va-yaavor) – which implies
that God did not make do with words alone.
In order to teach Moshe this essential concept of forgiveness through
enwrapping oneself like a sheliach tzibbur (atifa), God physically
demonstrated the act. What is the
meaning of this atifa?
Atifa hides the personality of the sheliach tzibbur; it
conceals him. Any individual can
pray without a tallit over his head; but the sheliach tzibbur must cover
his head. Only then can he serve as
an emissary of the community.
Sometimes, atifa can silence any attempt to pray. This is the kind of atifa which
causes one to “enter into the rock and hide in the dust for fear of God and for
the glory of His majesty” (Yeshayahu 2:10). A person who conceals himself in the
underground tunnels amongst the rocks for fear of facing God, stands totally
helpless before Him. However, there
is another kind of atifa, that of the sheliach tzibbur, who
conceals his entire personality, lowers his stature, and at the same time lives
continually with a sense of mission and responsibility towards the
community. Only then may he recite
the Thirteen Attributes of Mercy.
To become a sheliach tzibbur in this sense, one must understand
how God leads and guides His world and thus discover how a Jew should be seen by
others. Every Jew must be a leader,
each one of us must be responsible for the entire community. This is achieved through identification
with God’s attributes, which constitute his relationship with the community of
Am Yisrael. In order to
empathize with God’s attributes, it is enough to identify with the first one,
which the Kabbalists linked to the verse “Who is a God like You” (Mikha
7:18). Rabbi Moshe Cordovero (in
his Tomer Devora) expounds:
“Who
is a God like You” – This attribute refers to the Holy One as a tolerant King
Who bears insult in a manner beyond human understanding. Without doubt, nothing is hidden from
His view. In addition, there is not
a moment that man is not nourished and sustained by virtue of the Divine power
bestowed upon him.
Thus,
no man ever sins against God, without – at that very moment – God bestowing
abundant vitality upon him, giving him the power to move his limbs. Yet even though a person uses this very
vitality to transgress, God does not withhold it from him. Rather, He suffers this insult and
continues to enable his limbs to move.
Even at the very moment that a person uses that power for transgression,
sin, and infuriating deeds, the Holy One bears them patiently...
...This,
then, is a virtue man should emulate – namely, tolerance. Even when he is insulted to the degree
mentioned above he should not withdraw his benevolence from those upon whom he
bestows it.
Only when man has enwrapped himself like a sheliach tzibbur, when
his personality, his ego, does not exist, when his whole being is like that of a
sheliach tzibbur – only then can he emulate God’s tolerance. And if we succeed in emulating God’s
relationship with His people, we are assured forgiveness for our
sins.
The Mishna in Rosh Hashana (1:2) states that on the Day of
Judgment “All creatures pass before Him like Bnei Maron.” The Talmud (Rosh Hashana 18a)
explains:
Like
Bnei Maron – IN BAVEL it was translated, “like a flock of sheep” [Rashi:
like lambs counted for the animal tithe, which are counted one by one as they
pass through a small opening].
RESH
LAKISH said: As in the ascent of
Beit Maron [a textual variant reads “Beit Choron” – Rashi: a narrow pass where
wayfarers had to proceed in single file, since the valley was deep on both
sides].
RAV
YEHUDA SAID IN THE NAME OF SHEMUEL:
Like the troops of the House of David [Rashi: who pass in review one by
one as they go out to battle].
All three of these explanations express the experience of a man standing
alone before the Throne of Glory.
Generally, a person is able to console himself by virtue of his
membership in the community. When
he contemplates the tzibbur as a whole, he sees that he is not so
bad. He integrates himself into the
community, and does not stand out as being so much worse than everyone
else. The Mishna states: “On Rosh Hashana all creatures pass
before Him like Bnei Maron,” one by one; God assesses each person and
looks in all those corners that he himself has no wish to bring to light, at all
those points which he is trying to hide; but “if a person will hide himself away
– will I not see him?”
One opinion states that each individual comes for judgment alone, by
himself, just as lambs are counted for tithing. The other Amoraim add the fear of
judgment that accompanies this phenomenon – as in the ascent of Beit Choron,
where the chasm yawns beneath him.
Man must climb alone, up a steep ascent, while at every moment the danger
of falling into the abyss seems imminent.
Rav Yehuda is not satisfied with this. He likens the experience to that of
soldiers of the House of David, who go forth with the awareness that there can
be no battle without casualties!
And yet, the above Gemara continues, “Rav Yochanan said: [All the same,] they are all viewed
together... [as it says,] ‘He fashions their hearts TOGETHER, He who considers
ALL their deeds.’” We may also be
judged as a community, and thus draw God’s mercy down upon us. How can we accomplish this task? If a person is able to enwrap himself as
a sheliach tzibbur, to conceal his personality, to feel with every fiber
of his being a sense of communal responsibility, and thus to proclaim the
Thirteen Attributes – then “a covenant has been made that they will not be
turned away empty-handed.”
This feeling of responsibility and mission must pervade our
self-assessment. In the words of
the Gemara (Kiddushin 40b):
“A person should always see himself [and the whole world] as half guilty
and half innocent ... If he does
one mitzva – happy is he for having tilted himself and the entire world to the
side of merit. If he transgresses
one aveira – woe is he for having tilted himself and the entire world to
the side of guilt...” A person must
live with the sensation that an isolated act of his can cause revolutions and
decide the fate of the entire world.
With the sense that one’s actions will affect the fate of the community,
we may recite the Thirteen Attributes and merit God’s
mercy.
The first two attributes of God are “Hashem, Hashem” – “I am He
before man sins, and I am He after he has sinned and repented.” Why is there a need for mercy BEFORE the
sin? A person may feel that he is
unworthy of acting as a sheliach tzibbur. He might ask himself: “Am I able to carry the responsibility
for an entire world upon my puny shoulders? Surely I am as grave a sinner as
any.” Therefore we must
respond: God was also there before
the sin, and saw to it that no Jew would be able to distance himself to such an
extent that he would be incapable of returning to God! This is the meaning of “I am
Hashem before he sins.”
We now stand before the Day of Judgment, knocking on God’s doors, “as
beggars and paupers”. We have come
to beg God to “hear our jubilation (rina) and prayer.” There are two types of prayer: the
prayer of jubilation, and the prayer which is akin to “the prayer of a pauper
when he faints (ya’atof)” (Tehillim 102:1). [“Ya’atof” can also be translated
“enwraps.”] Rina abounds
when a person thanks God for everything that has passed, and requests: “Keep this forever.” But there is another aspect of prayer,
“A prayer of the afflicted when he faints (or enwraps),” when a person – as the Zohar describes King David – removes his crown, divests
himself of his royal robes, covers himself with sackcloth, sits on the ground,
and utters: “Master of the Universe, I am poor and lowly!”
“I am poor and lowly.” There
are times when prayer is that of “the pauper when he faints”. Man is likened to a fleeting
breath. He is like broken shard and
like a passing dream.
But a prayer of the pauper before he faints is so, first and foremost,
because of his frustration. How
optimistically he viewed things at the start of the year, and yet the year has
passed, and a person searches in vain for his accomplishments. Has he achieved even half of what he had
hoped for? It is this same
frustration which forms the basis of the month of Ellul. The Tur explains this idea
(beginning of siman 585) in the name of Pirkei DeRebbi
Eliezer. After the sin of the
Golden Calf, that same immense frustration was felt by Am Yisrael. Just a few weeks earlier, the angels
themselves had harbored jealousy towards Am Yisrael! When Moshe ascended Mt. Sinai for the
second time, on Rosh Chodesh Ellul, God commanded him to cause the shofar to be
blown in the camp. This was to warn
them not to stray after idolatry.
Therefore, Chazal enacted that the shofar be blown annually on
Rosh Chodesh Ellul and throughout the entire month, to warn us to
repent.
The Jewish people at that time experienced that same feeling of
frustration, of broken-heartedness.
They had reached the heights of spirituality when Moshe first ascended
the mount – and yet they fell from the highest levels to the lowest depths. And so Moshe Rabbeinu ascended that same
height once again, vividly recalling the exalted joy of his first climb. Yet, alas, he had to ascend once more
and begin again, only forty days later.
This is the experience of Ellul.
We could have lived and experienced the spectacle of the Giving of the
Torah all year long. The Gemara
relates how certain Tannaim studied Torah while a fire raged around
them. They said: Why be
amazed? Was not the Torah itself
given in fire! At that time, the
words were as joyous as when they were given on Sinai.
And yet we cannot always maintain the link between our prayers for
spiritual heights, and our everyday lives.
We pray every day:
“Enlighten our eyes in Your Torah, and cause our hearts to cleave to Your
mitzvot.” However, if – God
forbid – the prayer stands by itself, and when we understand words of Torah, we
fail to connect between our prayer and our achievements in learning – then we
risk losing the ability to experience the raging fire of Torah from
Sinai.
We can sit in the beit midrash and learn, and experience the
sweetness of Torah – and yet lose the link between prayer and learning. For when a person removes the tallit
from his head, he sees his “self” reflected everywhere he turns, and it becomes
difficult for him to refrain from revealing his own individuality. It becomes almost impossible to remain a
“sheliach tzibbur” throughout the day.
And so, our prayer is the “prayer of the pauper who enwraps
himself.” Needy and destitute, we
knock on God’s doors, full of frustration over the distance between our prayer
and our reality. However, this very
prayer of poverty and frustration can also redeem us. If we empathize totally with this aspect
of being paupers, we sense how wholly poor and empty we really are, this can
push us to completely enwrap ourselves and live with the perception of being a
sheliach tzibbur. In no other period of our history was Am Yisrael
so desperately in need of a leader.
No one may divest himself of the obligation to enwrap himself, and to
live as a sheliach tzibbur.
We live with this sensation of “the prayer of a pauper.” In this manner we will knock on God’s
doors, contemplate the Thirteen Attributes, and thus we will attain emulation of
God. With God’s help, we will not
be turned away empty-handed. In
this spirit we draw near to pray and to recite the Thirteen Attributes. We will request mercy for ourselves and
for the entire Jewish People. We
must search our hearts and ask ourselves honestly if we have risen to the tasks
that we took upon ourselves. Have
others really seen us as benei Torah in every step we have made, at home,
in the army, in the beit midrash, in university, at work, on the
street?
If our prayer is coupled with sincere self-examination and renewed desire
to act as leaders of our people, then a covenant has been made that we will not
be turned away empty-handed. God
will fulfill our requests, and we will merit forgiveness and mercy, and a year
of life and peace – for us and for all the Jewish People.
(This
sicha was delivered on the first night of Selichot, Ellul 5745
[1985].)
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